Hello. I'm really sorry for not updating my blog for the past few days. It was partly due to the fact that my college's internet has been down for almost more than five days. And fortunately during yesterday's first session of Saturday test, the internet generously came back to life. Yes. So I was sort of computerless for the past few days. Anyway, I am back now. I had Biology test yesterday and I felt that it was not too bad. Hmm, hopefully when the results are back next week I would get a sense of satisfaction about it. Right now, I'll just pray and wait. Because I think this first Biology test would really do a great deal on my future predictions for my teacher. Let's just all hope it would be a great and awesome start for now. :)
On the other hand, I feel that certain things in life are really very hard to be explained. You can't think of the specific words to really describe a situation. For example, relationships. I think it's one of the most difficult things in the world that needs to use up a lot of your brain power and energy in order to come up with a sufficiently good explanation for everything you do. I just don't understand why lately I tend to have this weird feelings, uncertainties, worries, and insecurity about everything around me. And most of it involves and occur within the relationship that I'm having now. Most people would think, why not just end it since it's causing so much problems all that? Why even bother complaining all the time when the best solution could be just ending it? Well, the answer to me is pretty simple I would say. For me, I would say that if a relationship can resort to that kind of solution that easily whenever every dilemma or hard times hit a relationship, I don't think that the both party in that relationship even treasures and appreciates the accompany they have of one another. I would think that it's just purely out of experimenting or curiousity to just have a partner without even realizing the actual whole purpose of having a relationship.
I know that in every relationship, one should always believe in each other and never hesitate and question about their trust. However, seeing from what I am experiencing now, I feel that I am going through a phase of rollercoaster. It's like I would never know what to expect the next moment; whether or not it would be another ride of thrill or just another stage that would surprise you. I think it is important that one should know what to expect and what to offer to the other in return in every relationships. But sometimes, I realize that setting expectations in a relationship will never do you any good. In fact, it would just make life even more difficult because for most of the times, I can assure you that not every other half of yours would live up to the expectation that you've had in your mind. More often, whenever I think back of what I'm having now, I will just tell myself: "Stop expecting the impossible from him. It will just drain your time and energy by thinking all these." So true enough, I've decided to stop expecting anything for good from him anymore. Instead, I will just live my days by following the flow, see what's going to come next and happen. And I will try to give all I can to face whatever that's thrown to me from this relationship. That's just it.
Whenever I think about our relationship, I often ask myself, "Is it worth my time by thinking all these? Why do I even bother thinking about mending and improving our relationship further when I don't even know whether he's doing the same thing too? How would I know whether he is not taking me for granted? HOW?!" Yes exactly. How would I even know all that when we hardly even talk about these things? It's really difficult you know. Thinking whether I should have just given up in the first place or just continue with this. But the answer is clearly quite obvious. That's why I'm still clinging on to the very last bit that I have in this relationship. Hopefully it's going to last. If it's not, then it's just too bad.
Oh well, I'm really very sorry that this post is mainly about my oh-so-boring relationship. I hope that to those of you out there who's in a relationship, treasure one another and tell each other constantly what's the problem in a relationship (only if there is, obviously). At the same time, try not to keep secrets from each other, because that would just make things even worse.
For the time being, I think the main problem in my relationship is the communication part. He always thinks that we are doing really fine that way. But honestly, I just don't see how normal and fine it is. I guess I just expect too much. Maybe I should really stop expecting anything from this relationship from now. Alright guys, I'm starting to feel that I've been talking too much about this for today. So I better end now before I keep going on and on and on....
So, till then!:)
xx.
On the other hand, I feel that certain things in life are really very hard to be explained. You can't think of the specific words to really describe a situation. For example, relationships. I think it's one of the most difficult things in the world that needs to use up a lot of your brain power and energy in order to come up with a sufficiently good explanation for everything you do. I just don't understand why lately I tend to have this weird feelings, uncertainties, worries, and insecurity about everything around me. And most of it involves and occur within the relationship that I'm having now. Most people would think, why not just end it since it's causing so much problems all that? Why even bother complaining all the time when the best solution could be just ending it? Well, the answer to me is pretty simple I would say. For me, I would say that if a relationship can resort to that kind of solution that easily whenever every dilemma or hard times hit a relationship, I don't think that the both party in that relationship even treasures and appreciates the accompany they have of one another. I would think that it's just purely out of experimenting or curiousity to just have a partner without even realizing the actual whole purpose of having a relationship.
I know that in every relationship, one should always believe in each other and never hesitate and question about their trust. However, seeing from what I am experiencing now, I feel that I am going through a phase of rollercoaster. It's like I would never know what to expect the next moment; whether or not it would be another ride of thrill or just another stage that would surprise you. I think it is important that one should know what to expect and what to offer to the other in return in every relationships. But sometimes, I realize that setting expectations in a relationship will never do you any good. In fact, it would just make life even more difficult because for most of the times, I can assure you that not every other half of yours would live up to the expectation that you've had in your mind. More often, whenever I think back of what I'm having now, I will just tell myself: "Stop expecting the impossible from him. It will just drain your time and energy by thinking all these." So true enough, I've decided to stop expecting anything for good from him anymore. Instead, I will just live my days by following the flow, see what's going to come next and happen. And I will try to give all I can to face whatever that's thrown to me from this relationship. That's just it.
Whenever I think about our relationship, I often ask myself, "Is it worth my time by thinking all these? Why do I even bother thinking about mending and improving our relationship further when I don't even know whether he's doing the same thing too? How would I know whether he is not taking me for granted? HOW?!" Yes exactly. How would I even know all that when we hardly even talk about these things? It's really difficult you know. Thinking whether I should have just given up in the first place or just continue with this. But the answer is clearly quite obvious. That's why I'm still clinging on to the very last bit that I have in this relationship. Hopefully it's going to last. If it's not, then it's just too bad.
Oh well, I'm really very sorry that this post is mainly about my oh-so-boring relationship. I hope that to those of you out there who's in a relationship, treasure one another and tell each other constantly what's the problem in a relationship (only if there is, obviously). At the same time, try not to keep secrets from each other, because that would just make things even worse.
For the time being, I think the main problem in my relationship is the communication part. He always thinks that we are doing really fine that way. But honestly, I just don't see how normal and fine it is. I guess I just expect too much. Maybe I should really stop expecting anything from this relationship from now. Alright guys, I'm starting to feel that I've been talking too much about this for today. So I better end now before I keep going on and on and on....
So, till then!:)
xx.
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